You see, dating is not about what to do or say but it is more about what you should not do and say. You see we can’t instruct our brain what it should do because our actions and thoughts are predetermined. But we can control our actions to those impulses and choose not to do it. So that’s what we’re talking about today because you don’t need to learn new things you just need to learn how to control it.
First one, don’t double text. I don’t care what excuses they have but you just send one text message and if they don’t respond call a few days later and if they still didn’t answer that’s it. People are not stupid you know they have their phones with them all the time so they know. You can delete their numbers or archive them if that helps so you don’t see them and remind yourself about them.
The second one is don’t tell people you know this strategy. Don’t talk about knowing the game talk about how you don’t like to play games and always verbally say it. Never say you apply these strategies and always be seen as somebody who’s just victimized.
Third thing, don’t tolerate inconsistencies in the beginning. This is why I kept telling people to give people space pre-emptively so they don’t ask for it, so you shouldn’t be afraid to pull away. Especially in the beginning if they are already showing inconsistencies then they just don’t like you. So if he cancels a date don’t even respond to the cancellation text and don’t respond at all find somebody else.
The fourth one is don’t seem too eager. Even if the other person show eagerness just slow it down because it gives you power. Don’t let the person speed things up because it will make you weak as well. Learn to say no and always find ways to seem like they’re speeding it up.
Fifth is don’t forget the warmth after coldness. So if you’re acting cold and you applied these strategies always follow it up with warmth. Because they might suspect you are playing the game so don’t be too cold. Warmth after coldness and vice versa remember that.
The sixth thing is don’t talk too much. Don’t sound butt hurt when a person cancels on you just relax. Another thing is don’t tell people what you want, find out what they want first then say it. It’s all about lowering people’s defenses. Also, know how to listen and let the other person do the talking, when the person leaves make them feel that they’re an interesting person in that way they’ll come back to you more.
The seventh one is don’t seem too perfect. Don’t be someone manipulative, or a liar try to come across as a generous good person but at the same time show your imperfections. You got to talk about your flaws and not curate everything to be good and by doing that you will not seem too perfect. Because that vulnerability will humanize you.
Eighth, don’t forget about the wrong things people did to you. If he cheats on you don’t take him back. If he abused you don’t just forget about it in fact don’t forgive.
The ninth thing is you should focus more on the negative than the positive. Always focus more on the negative things they do because it says a lot about them.
The tenth one is don’t over pursue. If someone declines you for some reason you will just say “You let me know when your schedule opens up and we’ll make it work” and then you’re done.
The eleventh one is don’t be too positive and develop rational negativity. So that means stop fantasizing and don’t imagine too much in that way you control your emotions.
The last one, don’t suffocate them with your presence. Leave and give them some space. Make them want to see you by seeing them less.