Today, we're going to talk about how to keep a guy and we're going to focus on the personality. This is more about who you are and the central core of your personality.
The key to having a great personality is simple, it's getting in touch with your inner child. Children, by nature, bring out our inner child and it causes us to feel good. Every person has a great personality deep down. As children, we were likable. We are actually ourselves when we were children. People love children not because of their imperfections but because of their uninhibition.
Humans have another nature inside of us, it's to charm.
As children, we naturally know how to charm people, it's our instinct but what causes us to lose it is our inhibition. The adult experience sheds us of our childish point of view.
The adult experience is necessary for planning but just don't overdo it. I'll teach you how to retain the spirit of the child rather than being one. You mix the rational and the inner child. The reason it’s important is because most people are trapped. Experiencing a child or younger people, helps us feel more alive. Like we’re back there. We love that.
Being an adult is amazing, like gaining the adult tendency. The adult tendency is more the analytical side. It's the ability to think of the future to plan and to think of the past in order to reflect na duse feedback but it becomes over bearing to the point that you become too adult-ish and you lose the child-like part of you. And that's how people become bitter and unlikable. The key is having a balance.
Now, let's talk about the causes of a bad personality and disbalance.
The first one is Social Conditioning which is based on the superficial social standards that are placed upon us. Now, social conditioning isn’t bad because it helps our society as a whole but it's bad for you as an individual ebcause it causes you to deviate from who you are, it's like it’s bad being yourself.
Another point is also because we compromise ourselves and we feel like we have unmet potential, and this causes people to get inhibited. This makes us bitter and secluded in our own little self.
Another reason that causes us to have a bad personality because of society is that we're holding on to the past. This causes us to lose our childhood tendencies because children let go of the past. By letting go of the past, it allows your brain to see the present moment. Holding on to the past rewire your emotional circuitry where you see threats that are not even there.
Now, what is having a good personality? Having a good personality means being undefensive. It enables you to accept new concepts and emmbrace the unknown, like a child. When you're not defensive, people also lower their defensiveness.
Another one is being open to the influence of others. when you're open to other people's perspectives or views, it makes you more seductive.
Also, not being afraid to feel pain makes a good personality. Every personality trait that arises comes from a place of not wanting to feel pain so if you learn to accept it, all of those destructive behavior automatically stops. Being fearless is attractive because you speak your mind.
Another one is being present to the moment because it means you're able to forgive and forget what happened.
Another part of having a great personality is the ability to show weakness and innocence and having contrasting personality traits that contradict each other. Having an air of a little bit condicting personality that comes out in a subtle way gives that whole roundedness. It makes you extremely unpredictable.
So these are the steps you can take to have a great personality, this is what's going to keep a guy.
We discuss this in greater detail in my course.... click here.