This subject is important because it speaks to the latent power that you have through your rational thinking and the ability to empathize. This has been suppressed during your childhood. This suppression causes you to become needy.
Let's talk about why humans developed mirror neurons. We developed it in order to deal with complex groups. We needed to learn how to deal with other people.
Before we developed language, the way that we communicated was at a pre-verbal level. We learned how to feel what's inside the other person. As humans developed, we invented language and the ability to use our rational minds. The result is that our ability to empathize with our brothers and sisters became more dimensional.
We were able to predict how they will act towards us. We're able to use their past behavior and use deductive reasoning to try to see who they are.
This helped us sense what people thought and deduce their motivations. This skill, the ability to understand people, is inside every one of us. The problem is that it has become latent.
As children, unlike other animals, we have a long period of dependency. We depend on our parents. They become an extension of us. Due to our dependence, we give our parents attributes that don't really belong to them. We see them as amazing. We see them as all-powerful.
We have developed trust in them by idealizing them.
As we grew older, we didn't mature out of that. That natural tendency to give your parents a more powerful aura extends to other people who you deem as superior.
We see our teachers as very smart people. We see professional athletes as gods.
The problem with that perspective is that it blinds you. It gives you a naive perspective.
What happens is we exaggerate their positive traits. Then, we ignore their negative traits.
We see the world through our needs. If you decided to grow and not depend on your parents, you will be scarred. However, your thinking will be closer to reality. You are no longer in the little box thinking that everything is perfect.
As you grow older, the people in your life you’re depending on would disappoint you. You begin to see their negative flaws. As a result of that disappointment, the pendulum swings toward you having a negative bias. You no longer notice their positive traits.
We developed the habit to see the world through our emotions. We depend on people to make us feel good. The way to grow out of this childish mentality is to face reality head-on.
Realize the nature of human beings. People will disappoint you. You cannot have that fantasy that everything will be perfect. Let go of that fantasy that one day you will meet the one who will fulfill your life. No guy will fulfill your life.
Move to the perspective that you should only depend on yourself because people are not dependable.
We discuss this in greater detail in my course.... click here.