I’m breaking down one of the episodes from Catch a Cheater. This episode is about a girl who sees her boyfriend cheating on her. She still stays with him and she even tries to deny the evidence and say that it didn't really happen.
I decided to talk about why you keep getting played by men and why men play women a lot.
Before she watched the recording, you'll notice that she is hoping that it works out.
When you have a fantasy about a relationship, your fantasy will always distort reality. Your incessant desire to have a relationship will always sabotage you.
You look at other people in relationships and you think that's happiness. You end up compromising your happiness to fulfill a fantasy.
Notice how she's close-minded and in reality she's hurting herself. It's a form of self-sabotage.
If you're aware of your inner desire to get into a relationship to be happy, you're one step further from being played consistently.
It's this type of mentality that tolerates abuse. It tolerates people lying to you because you become a victim.
You hope for everything to be perfect, but reality isn't that way. The reality is that people are after their self-interest.
In her mind, she was like ’F*ck, I shouldn't have tried to find out the truth. I should have stayed in my bubble.’
She was willing to deal with the fact that he's cheating on her just to keep her Imaginative world going.
In her mind, in order for her to be happy, she needs to be with him. Her happiness is dependent on him. That's the problem. When you become dependent on someone, they become your only source of good emotions.
You'll naturally fall into this trap. It's like a drug addiction where you have an unhealthy habit. You don’t consume something in moderation. You derive too much self-esteem from him.
You decided not to nurture your relationships with family and friends because he provides such a relief from your own pain. In reality, you're swimming in your own pain.
Her brain tried to rationalize things. When you get so traumatized by pain, you’re consistently in disbelief. You try to distort facts.
You could sense that there is a conflict in her reality.
We discuss this in greater detail in my course.... click here.