I remember that I made a lot of friends when I was a kid. I used to have toys in my house. All the kids in the area would gravitate towards my house. I was open to meet new friends.
We think we get a reflection of our childhood through our memories. The best way to recall our childhood is to remember how it felt to be a child. Think about your emotional experience of reality. When you were a child, you were more open to experiences.
You felt naive. You saw adults as sources of information. When somebody suggested something, you were open to new experiences. You were always open to life. You didn't have a lot of barriers.
As you grew older, you developed limitations. Those limitations come in the form of your personality. You say I am this kind of person. I am that kind of person. I am not that kind of person. That sets certain limitations. Those limitations come in the form of emotions.
Emotions block you off from performing a certain way. Those emotions are fear, apprehension, procrastination. All of those things are emotions. In reality, it's just a parameter to your personality.
Those barriers unintentionally create barriers between you and other people. You become afraid of the world. The world hurts you. The brutality of life hurts you. You don't know how to cope with those strong emotions. If you don't have a good coping mechanism, you tend to grow inward so you don't experience the pain.
Now you're not as open to make friends. You're afraid to make friends. You're safer alone because you believed that going into yourself means safety.
You create an enemy of the world. You're not open to anyone.
One of the memories of children is playing with people. As children, we want to connect with the world. You can bring your friends over and you automatically become friends.
There is no pain from the past that's causing emotions to make relationships complicated. You're not dealing with insecurities. As children, we're still kind of clean.
As children, we're not taught how to handle emotions so we grow inward. The reason it's easier to make friends as children is that we are more open to the world. We have a sense of wonder. You're more open to experience.
As we grow older, we sort of become afraid. We develop habits. If we don't have a lot of friends, we usually do things alone. We don't invite people to do things. You say no to invitations because you're comfortable being alone.
It's all about finding the equilibrium. That equilibrium can be found when you love life. Love life, not just when you're alone, but also when you’re around other people.
We discuss this in greater detail in my course.... click here.